Day 6 - Sometimes it's hard...

So as i think back to 6 years ago when i was diagnosed with a brain tumor, i can't help but think about the family and friends i knew then, that i know prayed for me, loved me, and comforted my family and i, that are no longer with us on earth. Somedays i think to myself "Why me God, Why did you choose to let me live, but bring them Home to spend eternity with You?" To some people this may sound absolutely crazy that i think that, but it is absolutely true. How can i not think that? How can i not think about the fact that 6 years ago i knew people who had cancer, would get cancer in the next 3 years following, or were perfectly healthy at that time...and now they are gone...now they are dead. I find peace in the fact that those loved ones are in Heaven with our King, and that i wll see them again one day. It is just hard for me to be at peace with the fact that i am living, and they are not, well on earth that is. I know full well that God has be on this earth for a purpose. I understand that He has an amazing plan for my life, it is just difficult at times to not exactly know that purpose, and still be totally happy about where my life is. I may sound a bit crazy...but it is almost 2 in the morning...and i do have bronchitis...and i am on medicine. haha. But as i was sitting last night i started thinking about this whole topic, and i thought of a song that i used to really love, and it describes this perfectly. Yes it may be a Hilary Duff song, and yes it may be a little bit cheesy, but it is 100% true. Someone's watchin over me....not just someone, a lot of someones! And that to me is more amazing than anything...I miss you Great Grandma Ollie, Ian, Mrs. Arnold, Grandpa Herman...but i know that you are all in Heaven having a wonderful time! I LOVE YOU!

Here is the Song....

Found myself today
Oh I found myself and ran away
Something pulled me back
The voice of reason I forgot I had
All I know is you're not here to say
What you always used to say
But it's written in the sky tonight

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
Someone's watching over me

Seen that ray of light
And it's shining on my destiny
Shining all the time
And I wont be afraid
To follow everywhere it's taking me
All I know is yesterday is gone
And right now I belong
To this moment to my dreams

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
Someone's watching over me

It doesn't matter what people say
And it doesn't matter how long it takes
Believe in yourself and you'll fly high
And it only matters how true you are
Be true to yourself and follow your heart

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
That I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even when it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
That someone's watching over
Someone's watching over
Someone's watching over me

Someone's watching over me

So thats all i have for tonight everyone...i have to sleep...for tomorrow is a celebration dinner with my best friends!

xoxo

Shelby Elyse